I still don’t like the pirates. I’m probably never going to like the pirates. Given what I’ve heard about the next episode, I’m going to start hating the pirates. Because we all know you can’t trust a pirate, and I would have thought Spartacus would have had a little more intelligence than that. Seriously, the entire series is just one bad idea of his after another until things escalated into a full blown war.
The rebels are kindly letting people into their new city, as long as the people are former slaves. A fact they have to prove by not only handing over their weapons, but by showing their brand. At this point, Saxa decides to grab some woman’s boobs. And the woman doesn’t seem to mind. Now, I don’t actually have a problem with the everyone is bi trope. I’m rather fond of it myself. What I do have a problem with is when this trope only seems to extend to the female characters. Because while somehow Saxa seems to stumble across all the bisexual woman, no one ever seems to randomly stumble across some bisexual men. If you’re going to play the game, at least make it fair for everyone.
Anyway, Julius Caesar is inside the gates! And he quickly makes friends with the rebels by helping them stop a small handful of Romans who “managed” to sneak through. We also find out what the woman was doing to him earlier: she was making it look like he had cut off a slave brand. I was hoping for something more interesting, like a treatment for his epilepsy. The real reason was actually rather boring. However, as Agron is quick to point out, no one sends in a only a few men to stop a rebellion. Certainly not the wily and intelligent Crassus. Listen to Agron people. Sometimes he and Gannicus are the only two that are making any sense.
Speaking of Gannicus, he is tasked with the purpose of training the new men who have come into the city in an attempt to see if any of them are lying about their former status as slaves. Sybil stands in the background and watches on. I really don’t like Sybil. Her only purpose seems to be to stand around and stare at Gannicus. If she’s not staring at him, she’s basing all her life decisions on what he will think. If we honestly are trying to extol her “virtues” above Saxa in the long run, I will be very disappointed. The only way I will ever like Sybil as a character is if she realizes she needs to stop basing all her life decisions around Gannicus. Until then, I don’t want to see her silently snooping around in the corner.
Crixus doesn’t trust JC, and with good reason, so he gives Nemetes the task of testing where Ceasar’s true loyalties lie. There is absolutely no way that this could end up badly.
Spartacus, being tailed by Agron, goes to ask Laeta what she knows about Crassus. She tells him how Crassus is a master of manipulating people into being exactly where he wants them to be. Spartacus realizes too late that he was also a victim of Crassus’ ploys. Laeta also remains the most intelligent person on the show, pointing out to Spartacus that when it comes to war, wisdom and intelligence have just as much a place as brawn on the battlefield. Shame all of Spartacus’ smarts come from fighting in the arena and not fighting wars, because I have a feeling that’s going to hurt him in the long run. Oh, wait.
Back in camp Roman, which is also surrounded by walls, so much for that Spartacus, Crassus decides that his son’s troops need to be punished. With a good old fashioned decimation. So, Tiberius has to dye the stones himself, and he tells good pal Sabinus that he will ask his father for him to be excused since he was the only soldier that did not run. Sabinus refuses to take the out. I wonder where this could possibly be heading?
Back in Rebellion City, Nemetes is doing his best to make Caesar either his best friend or fess up that he’s an enemy spy. Unfortunately, Nemetes isn’t very good at either. Crixus comes in to check on his progress, and some whore is just dying. Nemetes says he has one final test for Caesar, and Crixus tells him to get on with it. I’m not one hundred percent sure if Crixus knew exactly what Nemetes was planning, but even still, his later reaction does not endear him to me.
Nemetes takes Caesar to a Roman woman he’s been keeping for his own entertainment. Well, his and half the other rebels. She asks Caesar to free her, which he does by killing her and taking her body to Nemetes, where he tells them that he would free all Romans in the city walls. I see what you did there, Caesar. The two of them take the body to Crixus and the other Romans, because Caesar has a mind to start a riot.
Here’s where I actually start to really hate Crixus. Because the woman is naked, he has to know that she’s been raped. Very likely repeatedly. Just like Naevia had been. So, when it happens to Naevia, we must kill everyone in sight, but because this woman is a Roman, it’s okay, we’ll just use her brother doing something that Crixus would have done himself as an excuse to kill all the Roman prisoners. Like, Crixus, I don’t care if you and Spartacus had some grand scheme cooked up to make it look like you were fighting, that’s just unacceptable.
Back at the decimation, Crassus decides his son has to participate as well. Crassus, sweetie, I’m pretty sure that wasn’t what Kore meant when she told you to start treating your son like a man. They draw their stones, and while Tiberius is safe, Sabinus has been marked for death. Which I would just like to take a moment to point out how brave that boy was, because while the other people marked for death started crying, screaming, trying to run away, and flat out panicking, he just stood there like a rock. Because he knew that his death meant Tiberius would live, and he was just such a brave little baby that it made the next scene all the more painful to watch. Because Tiberius had to participate in killing, brutally, what was very likely his only friend. Congratulations, Crassus, your son is no longer the little boy you were always viewing him as. He is now quite dead on the inside. Nice job breaking it.
While the decimation is going on at the Roman camp, the rebels are making sure to kill a bunch of Romans. Meanwhile, Saxa is trying to lead the group of escaped Romans safely to Spartacus’ villa. They come across some nasty rebels who tell her that they don’t have to listen to Gannicus’ bitch if Gannicus isn’t there. Saxa proceeds to cut them, because as far as she’s concerned, they’re the bitches. I find myself cheering on Saxa here, because she deserves so much more than that. Spartacus yells at them for killing all his new toys. Crixus responds that they all deserve to die. What child ever raped Naevia, Crixus? And what about your own rebels have been raping the Romans in return?